Wednesday November 21, 2018
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Couples bad at picking up on partner’s sad feelings: Study

For the study, over 100 participants completed daily diaries about their mood and the mood of their partners for seven consecutive nights

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Couples have tough time understanding soft negative emotions like sadness, loneliness of each other: Study.
Couples have tough time understanding soft negative emotions .
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  • Researchers have found that couples find it tough to identify negative soft emotions
  • Relationship related emotions can be identified more easily
  • The unidentified emotions can cause problems in relationships

Your spouse may react immediately when you feel anger, but is he/she equally good at knowing when you feel sad or lonely? No, suggests new research.

Couples do pretty well at picking up one another’s more intense feelings, like happiness or anger, but they are not as sensitive to “soft negative” emotions, said the study published in the journal Family Process. Couples do poorly when it comes to knowing their partner is sad, lonely or feeling down, the findings showed.

Couples do poorly when it comes to soft negative emotions of each other.
Couples do poorly when it comes to soft negative emotions of each other.

“We found that when it comes to the normal ebb and flow of daily emotions, couples aren’t picking up on those occasional changes in ‘soft negative’ emotions like sadness or feeling down,” said study lead author Chrystyna Kouros, Associate Professor at Southern Methodist University, Dallas, US.

The researchers believe that even when a negative mood is not related to the relationship, it ultimately can be harmful to a couple. “Failing to pick up on negative feelings one or two days is not a big deal,” Kouros said.

Also Read: Tamil Nadu to Build Safe Houses for Inter-Caste Couples

“But if this accumulates, then down the road it could become a problem for the relationship. It’s these missed opportunities to be offering support or talking it out that can compound over time to negatively affect a relationship,” she added.

For the study, over 100 participants completed daily diaries about their mood and the mood of their partners for seven consecutive nights. The problem is not one for which couples need to seek therapy, Kouros said.

Instead, she advises couples to stop assuming they know what their partner is feeling. “I suggest couples put a little more effort into paying attention to their partner — be more mindful and in the moment when you are with your partner,” she said.

She cautions, however, against becoming annoying by constantly asking how the other is feeling, or if something is wrong. IANS

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10 Tips to Spend Quality Time with Your Family

“The best thing you can give to your family is YOUR TIME”.

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Family walk with dog. Pixabay

To earn bread for our family and give a better living to our children, we often forget that the best thing we can offer them is our time. We try to buy all the luxuries for our loved ones and even purchasing the best health insurance plan to make them feel secure. We do this all to ensure that our family has the assured financial security, especially when we are not around. However, what if we are with them? Are we able to spend quality time with our family members? Probably not, and this is the story of most Indian working couples.

By explaining all this, we do not mean that you should stop earning or leave your job to spend time with your family. Instead, we want to say that take some time out of your busy schedule and spend few hours every day with your loved ones.

If you are unable to find out a way to spend some-time with your family and loved ones, we are here to solve your problem. Today, we are discussing top 10 ways to spend more time with your loved ones:

Term insurance, time
Your family members will be covered financially, in the case of your absence. Pixabay

 

  • Have at least one meal together: Be it breakfast or dinner, try to have at least one meal of the day with your entire family. Generally, due to our busy routine in the mornings and different timings of schools and offices, becomes difficult to have breakfast together. However, having dinner together is not tough; so make sure to have your dinner with your family.
  • Drop your child/children to school or extra classes: If possible, drop your children at their school on your own. This will give you all a travel time together, and you can discuss various school-related issues they may have without any other interventions. If it is not possible to drop them to school, try to drop or pick them up from their extra classes. In this way, you can convert your travel time into ‘together time’ even on weekdays, without bothering anyone.
  • Go for weekly family outings: Whether it is a latest movie or zoo, take some time out of your busy schedule for a family outing. Moreover, take the opinion of your children and spouse to plan something for the weekend.
  • After dinner walks: This tip is especially for married couples who live with joint family or have kids. Generally, such couples miss ‘together time’; therefore, for them, it is suggested to have an after-dinner walk. In this walk, you can discuss your day or anything that you want to share with your partner.
Term insurance, time
A family that eats together, stays together and healthy! Pixabay
  • Share your experiences and family stories with your kids at their bedtime: Try to spend some quality moments with your family at bedtime. Read some storybooks of your child’s interest or tell some family stories or your experiences to your children while they are in their bed.
  • Celebrate family traditions: India is a country of culture and traditions, and if you start celebrating these traditions, there is no need for any other family get-togethers. It is a good method to spend quality time with your family as well as make your children understand your family traditions.
  • Turn your mobile off when you are at home with your family: One more problem that every family faces these days is interference of smartphones. Even though all the family members come home on time, they all keep themselves busy on their mobile phones. Have you ever noticed that despite sitting together for long hours in the same room, we all do not talk to each other and remain busy on our phones? Leave this habit; rather switch your phone off when at home to spend more time with your family than on social media.
  • Keep in touch with your extended family members and relatives: Despite the fact that we all have a long list of tasks for our weekends, we should meet our relatives. We all must try to visit our extended family members or call them to our place at least once in a month. This is because family ties are precious and will our children adjust with people rather living alone in a nuclear family.
Time
Be it breakfast or dinner, try to have at least one meal of the day with your entire family. Wikimedia Commons
  • Spare some time to do nothing: This is to assure your family members that they are your priority. By doing this, you make sure to your family that you do not have any other plan than spending some time together to do nothing. Simply talk to each other about past week or plans or discuss some good experiences or bad moments. This will give you an insight of which your family member is suffering these days. Moreover, if you have teenagers at home, you can connect with them as well.

Also Read: Family Size Can Be Determined By Reproductive Rights: Study

  • Cook the favorite recipe for your family together: Cooking together can be a lot of fun for both young and old people in the family. Get advice from the eldest member of your family for the better recipe, whereas involve the youngest in other easiest task of cooking. In this way, everyone will be involved in this family cooking event, and all will love the outcome. Do not forget to click pictures of these moments of togetherness and make videos of sweet activities of your small kids.

 

By following all the above-mentioned recommendations or even a few of them will improve your bond with your family. Moreover, it will give you several chances to spend some time with your loved ones.