Monday June 18, 2018
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Couples bad at picking up on partner’s sad feelings: Study

For the study, over 100 participants completed daily diaries about their mood and the mood of their partners for seven consecutive nights

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Couples have tough time understanding soft negative emotions like sadness, loneliness of each other: Study.
Couples have tough time understanding soft negative emotions like sadness, loneliness of each other: Study.
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  • Researchers have found that couples find it tough to identify negative soft emotions
  • Relationship related emotions can be identified more easily
  • The unidentified emotions can cause problems in relationships

Your spouse may react immediately when you feel anger, but is he/she equally good at knowing when you feel sad or lonely? No, suggests new research.

Couples do pretty well at picking up one another’s more intense feelings, like happiness or anger, but they are not as sensitive to “soft negative” emotions, said the study published in the journal Family Process. Couples do poorly when it comes to knowing their partner is sad, lonely or feeling down, the findings showed.

Couples do poorly when it comes to soft negative emotions of each other.
Couples do poorly when it comes to soft negative emotions of each other.

“We found that when it comes to the normal ebb and flow of daily emotions, couples aren’t picking up on those occasional changes in ‘soft negative’ emotions like sadness or feeling down,” said study lead author Chrystyna Kouros, Associate Professor at Southern Methodist University, Dallas, US.

The researchers believe that even when a negative mood is not related to the relationship, it ultimately can be harmful to a couple. “Failing to pick up on negative feelings one or two days is not a big deal,” Kouros said.

Also Read: Tamil Nadu to Build Safe Houses for Inter-Caste Couples

“But if this accumulates, then down the road it could become a problem for the relationship. It’s these missed opportunities to be offering support or talking it out that can compound over time to negatively affect a relationship,” she added.

For the study, over 100 participants completed daily diaries about their mood and the mood of their partners for seven consecutive nights. The problem is not one for which couples need to seek therapy, Kouros said.

Instead, she advises couples to stop assuming they know what their partner is feeling. “I suggest couples put a little more effort into paying attention to their partner — be more mindful and in the moment when you are with your partner,” she said.

She cautions, however, against becoming annoying by constantly asking how the other is feeling, or if something is wrong. IANS

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Is Your Relationship Suffering Due to Mobile Technology?

If your partner is using their mobile phone a huge amount, it can even create paranoia as you may think they are up to no good

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Is Your Relationship Suffering Due to Mobile Technology?
Is Your Relationship Suffering Due to Mobile Technology? Pixabay

We all know that relationships have to be worked on in order to keep the spark going but there are many things that can get in the way of this. When you lead busy lifestyles, have the responsibility of family life to manage, have financial issues to sort out, and have other commitments that get in the way of spending time together, things can get very difficult. Over recent years, there is one more thing that has affected many relationships and this is mobile technology.

Mobile technology has become hugely popular and has a positive effect on our lives in many ways. We can work more easily and flexibly, browse the Internet, contact friends and family, make purchases, enjoy entertainment, and much more thanks to this technology. However, the downside is that some people become obsessed with mobile technology and the services that they can access on these devices, and this can really get in the way of a relationship.

Improving your communication and enjoying more quality time

Every couple must try to spend quality time together to improve communication
Every couple must try to spend quality time together to improve communication. Pixabay

When it comes to mobile phones, there are many people that are barely ever seen without their device in their hand. While it is find to use your phone while out and about or when making and taking calls, spending more time on your device rather than talking to your partner can cause a lot of issues. If you already get little enough time to work on your relationship, the last thing you want is to find that your partner is more interested in their phone during the short periods you do get to spend together. This is why it is important to talk and lay down some ground rules when it comes to mobile phone usage as a couple.

If your partner is using their mobile phone a huge amount, it can even create paranoia as you may think they are up to no good. Many people have gone onto their partner’s social media accounts or used tools to find out whose phone number is on their partner’s log because they have become suspicious. Often, it is all perfectly innocent but that doesn’t mean that you won’t become worried or paranoid if your partner spends more time on their mobile device than they do talking to you.

It is important for both partners to be aware of the ground rules when it comes to mobile phone use. Of course, if you have an urgent call or a family member needs to get in touch you should take the call. However, when you are both snuggling up to watch a movie and one of you then goes on their phone and starts messing around on social media, it can ruin the whole experience. When you spend time together, it should be quality time where you can talk, watch films, listen to music, go out for meals, and do other things you enjoy rather than just watching one another using mobile phones in total silence.