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It is said that a narcissist is both appealing and appalling. Here is a person who can be accomplished and charming on the one hand, and arrogant and condescending on the other.
In her 2013 track Applause, singer Lady Gaga, dressed in the infamous “meat dress” sings “I live for the applause, applause, applause I live for the applause-plause, live for the applause-plause Live for the way that you cheer and scream for me The applause, applause, applause…” The song might be flashy and over-the-top, hard to miss, but in real life we deal with narcissism in a more subtle way.
Who is a narcissist?
Narcissistic personality disorder – one of several types of personality disorders – is a mental condition in which people have an inflated sense of their own importance, a deep need for excessive attention and admiration, troubled relationships, and a lack of empathy for others, say reports.
One thing that is commonly seen with narcissistic people is their lack of empathy and their sense of entitlement, says Radhika Bapat, Clinical Psychotherapist.
Bapat shares a few red flags to tell you if your partner is a narcissist:
Does your partner always act as if everything is about her/him/them?
Does your partner act entitled and make the rules, but minimize and break them as well?
Is your partner someone who puts you down often?
Is your partner demanding of whatever she/he/they want?
Is your partner distrustful of your motives?
Do you have to listen to your partner all the time, else get into a fight (My way or the highway)?
Does your partner believe they are better than you and get bored with you easily?
Is your partner unable and uninterested in your experiences and your pain/illness, and lacking in empathy?
Is your partner always preoccupied with only what they consider important (minimizing what you consider as important)?
Do you feel the need to constantly give praise and recognition to your partner in order to get their attention?
If the answers to the questions are in the affirmative, you could be in an interpersonally exploitative relationship. Such a relationship is full of paradoxes. On the one hand your partner could be incredibly romantic and entertaining when they desire you and on the other hand they could be completely self-centred, unfeeling and draconian when they don’t want you. Such relationships often confuse you, making you feel “stuck” and eventually emotionally drained, opines Bapat.
In order to gain better control of your life, psychologists advise that you first and foremost, get help. A mental health practitioner will help you rule out any clinical depression or anxiety that you may be suffering from as a result of chronic stress. Next, they will help you choose short and long-term goals, keeping in mind your own safety and well-being. These goals would include important decisions such as leaving a relationship or choosing to remain. If you choose to stay and your (narcissistic) partner chooses to be a part of the healing process (rare but it happens), therapists will focus on giving insights to both of you into understanding self-defeating, emotional and cognitive patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving established from childhood and repeated throughout life. This is known as “Schema based” work.
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In a way, narcissistic people crave attention in order to feel good about themselves, and they show a form of withdrawal (like drug withdrawal) in the absence of such positive admiration. This withdrawal could be in the form of a tantrum, where they need to state — how well they know you (better than you know yourself), how well-respected they are (and more powerful than you), how they can ruin you (and keep their own reputations in-tact), Bapat adds.
Similarly, the victims of such a relationship (if this is you) could suffer from low self-esteem and become overly dependent without realizing the damage done, especially to their (your) own life chances. It becomes important to know and accept their (your) role as a victim and gradually learn to develop their (your) own self-confidence and self-worth by learning to practice self-compassion. Above all, it is important to not settle for a relationship where one is disrespected and in which there is no mutual growth. Such a relationship is bound to be toxic. (IANS)
The Reformation in England is notorious for the religious impact it had on the countries of the world, and the current ongoing dispute among the various factions of Catholicism and Protestantism. Three Blind Mice, a rhyme that emerged in 1609, roughly a few years after the death of Queen Elizabeth I, is somewhat a dark reminder of the Dark Ages.
The Reformation began in England when King Henry VIII broke away from the Catholic church because he wanted to divorce his wife, to marry another woman who would bear him a male heir. His wife was a devout catholic and refused to give up her crown to another. The king decided to break away from the Papacy, from Rome, where the Catholic church reigned from. He created the Church of England, and put himself as the legal head. England broke into two factions based on religion, and after Henry's death, the country was plunged in war.
Henry's eldest daughter, Queen Mary I took the throne after her father, and propagated Catholicism, as taught by her mother. Henry's other daughter, through his second wife, Queen Elizabeth I embraced the Protestant faith. Queen Mary was always paranoid of losing her throne to Elizabeth, and she hated the Protestants because of what happened to her mother. She set about ruthlessly persecuting anyone who openly professed their faith, which led to her being known as 'Bloody Mary'.
Illustration of Christian protestants being burned at the stake Image source: wikimedia commons
History has recorded the death of three Bishops, Ridley, Lattimer, and Crammer, known as the Oxford martyrs. They were burned at stake for teaching the Protestant doctrine. The rhyme Three Blind Mice is believed to be an allegorical allusion to the incident of the bishops' execution. They are called 'blind' because of their refusal to recant their confession. Queen Mary is said to have "cut off their tales with a carving knife" and is referred to as a farmer's wife to lighten the scene for children; perhaps to also reduce the ruthlessness of the act.
Three blind mice. Three blind mice.
See how they run. See how they run.
They all ran after the farmer's wife,
Who cut off their tails with a carving knife,
Did you ever see such a sight in your life,
As three blind mice (Modern version of the rhyme, Wikipedia)
Three Blind Mice is sung widely in nurseries of the world by little children, often innocent of the true story behind it.
Keywords: Three Blind Mice, Nursery Rhymes, Reformation, Persecution, England, Queen Mary
The pandemic brought about a global boom of entrepreneurship in 2020. Thousands of small businesses launched in the UK last year, and many were very successful. Some businesses started as passion projects, while others aimed to fill a hole in the pandemic market. Services and products, like at-home workouts, popped up all over social media from new and exciting businesses. The pandemic left many Brits financially unstable and scared for the future of their career. Launching their own business gave them something to focus on again and a small amount of income.
The Financial Times reported that the number of registered companies in the UK increased by 30% in 2020. As the world returns to normal, it will be interesting to see how these new businesses approach the post-pandemic world.
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If you have just set up a new business, here are some essential marketing tips to get the ball rolling:
Exploit social media
Social media is one of the most effective marketing platforms available. You can connect with a global audience for free and market your product or service to them. Post consistently and use high-quality imaging to catch your audience's attention. Engage with potential customers by replying to direct messages, comments, shares and likes. Use a few platforms to maximise your exposure and create a strong brand identity.
You can connect with a global audience for free and market your product or service to them. | Photo by Alexander Shatov on Unsplash
Network as much as you can
Networking is a vital part of business, and you can do it on and offline. Use sites like LinkedIn to connect with fellow entrepreneurs and those in different industries. Reach out to them directly and ask about their company or role. You might be surprised by how much you can learn from one conversation. Once in-person events return, you should look to make the most out of meeting people in your industry. You might find brands to collaborate with or a mentor to learn from. Make sure to hand out your business cards at the event so people can get in touch with you in the future.
Networking is a vital part of business, and you can do it on and offline. | Photo by Chris Montgomery on Unsplash
Create a blog
You need to be an expert in your industry. Create a blog and share your journey of learning to be a business owner. You can share your expertise and why you started the company, which other entrepreneurs can read and learn from. Your knowledge and experience might be extremely helpful for those just starting out. Use a range of marketing techniques to launch your business into the next phase.
Use a range of marketing techniques to launch your business into the next phase. | Photo by Sincerely Media on Unsplash
(Disclaimer: This article is sponsored and include some commercial links)
One of Indias fast growing Direct To Consumer (DTC) beauty and personal care brands, MyGlamm, launches its national TVC around the message 'All Natural #NoNasties today with actress Shraddha Kapoor, who is also an investor in the brand.
Kapoor who has a great millennial and Gen Z connect introduces 'My SUPERFOODS Kajal' which has No Parabens, No Mineral Oils, No Nasties while still being long-lasting and smudge-free and made with the goodness of nature. This is followed by many girls trying applying the kajal with confidence and while highlighting the ingredients Avocado Oil, Goji Berries, Vitamin E and Sunflower Seed Oil.
Commenting on the campaign, Apratim Majumder, CMO, MyGlamm says "Women have been telling us about what they want from their beauty products for a while now. Wikimedia Commons
The brand focuses on creating quality products that are high efficacy made with all-natural and no chemicals in the formulae. his campaign follows the #TellMyGlammWhatYouWant campaign where women logged in to tell the company what they wanted from their beauty products. It aims to establish a beauty democracy by giving consumers the power to tell the brand what they want thus changing the entire experience of how women buy beauty products in India.
Commenting on the campaign, Apratim Majumder, CMO, MyGlamm says "Women have been telling us about what they want from their beauty products for a while now. We have been innovating to serve those needs with products. When they told us that they want a kajal that is not only long-lasting and smudge-proof but also takes care of their eyes, we knew we had to do this. The campaign is about telling everyone out there who told us they need a kajal that cares, MyGlamm Superfoods Kajal is here for you! The campaign debued on MyGlamm's social channels- YouTube & Instagram on September 16. (IANS/ MBI)
Keywords: India, Direct beauty brands, My Glamm national, girls, kajal, confidence ingredients, Avocado Oil, Shraddha Kapoor