Currently, divorce has become so rampant; for instance, in the U.S, the divorce rate stands at a whopping 50 percent! It’s alarming, right? However, when you’re on the wrong side of these odds such statistics even makes it more painful.
Good news for you! Unhappy marriage does not mean the end result is divorce. Provided one of you has a strong desire to salvage the marriage, it’s possible.
Marriage counseling in Denver state that they have helped so many couples to reconcile and enjoy their marriage again. Some of the couples had even signed the divorce papers while others were at the verge of divorce.
Which tactics did they use? Below are 6 steps that prominent marriage therapists recommend to salvage your marriage.
Accept your spouse’s feelings
It’s okay to feel anxious and down-casted if your spouse wants a divorce; however, it doesn’t mean your partner will not come around.
Each one of you has the right to express or feel the way they want to; therefore, you have to agree that your spouse wants out. It’s important for you to accept your partner’s position without manipulating it.
This will help you get to the root cause and most likely things will turn around and reawaken your love towards each other.
This might be the last thing you want to do! You need to approach your spouse and validate why they want to leave the marriage.
This is very powerful; just keep it brief and straightforward. For instance, you can tell your spouse, “I understand. You feel I haven’t been faithful to you.”
Confirm that you understand from their perspective even if you don’t agree.
You need to block the fight or flight reaction that is easily awakened by divorce threat. You should remain calm, kind, mature and the affectionate person that your spouse fell in love with.
Take a break
Give your companion space; don’t try to pursue, plead or beg your partner at such a time. Do your thing as this is time to let go. Create a scenario whereby your partner will miss you.
Work on yourself
At this time you need to concentrate on building yourself and being the best person you can be. Visit friends, marriage therapists like those Marriage Counseling in Denver or learn yoga.
Ultimately your spouse will notice the changes and the new positive attributes in you.
After following the above guidelines, most likely your spouse will come around. You can meet for coffee and focus on positive discussion, not on the fallen relationship.
Once the barrier is broken and you can smile and laugh again; you can gauge if you can work out things together.
It is important to note that stable marriage needs both partners to be actively involved. After following the steps above, you should assess if your partner is reciprocating or you are just hitting a rock.
You can involve a counselor along the process in case things are not adding up. Try as hard as you can to salvage your marriage, but if your spouse doesn’t show up you will still feel great how you carried yourself.