Saturday, May 15, 2021
Home Opinion The Funny Side: Someone is probably filming you reading this

The Funny Side: Someone is probably filming you reading this

bigstock_White_Homing_pigeon_with_lette_18873011

 

By Nury Vittachi

All adults have a vital duty to tell young people about The Olden Days (a phrase which covers the period from the early Triassic era to about 2008).

“In the past, people would go a whole day without taking a single picture of anything,” I declared. My Facebooking Snapchatting children were stunned.

“So how did you have fun, dad,” one asked. “We would look at clouds and see if we could find animal shapes,” I told them. Yes, life was thrilling then. They have no idea.

But now family life is upside down! In my house, the only people who can open child-proof packaging are the children. The only people who can get past the net-nanny web filter are the children. The only people who can do online hedge-fund asset swaps that crash the Dow Jones are the children.

One friend said that this resourceful, hi-tech generation of youngsters would make great spies. No, I’ve met spies, and it’s no fun: they get swallowed up by their cover jobs. I knew one agent who played the part of a hard-drinking, grizzled journalist so well that he drank himself to death. Probably got an authenticity award from the espionage community.

What’s more, read the news: the whole hi-tech spying thing has been outsourced to wildlife. A few days ago, a pigeon was arrested and charged with espionage on the Pakistan-India border – not a joke. The bird was detained for acting suspiciously, which probably means it was wearing a false moustache and taking snaps of military facilities. Indian security officers discovered messages in a foreign language and a phone number written on its feathers, the news item said.

Now spies don’t usually share contact details, so this might just be the pigeon equivalent of when you write down your phone number on your hand because you’re getting old.

Pigeons get old too, right?

Just a week before the dramatic pigeon arrest, the Egyptian authorities detained a stork for espionage and readers may recall the still-earlier incident when the Iranian army arrested 14 squirrels for suspiciously hanging out in the woods near a nuclear enrichment facility.

Smug officials proudly said they detained the creatures “before they were able to take any action”, but did not say what the squirrels’ expected actions were. I suspect the list would include “eating nuts”, “hanging out in trees”, and “stealing food from bird feeders”, which are things we’ve all done at some time, right? Or is that just me?

The night before writing this, this writer was strolling to a meeting and looked to the skies for animal-shaped clouds. Lo and behold, there was a camera drone hovering overhead!

It stayed there for about two minutes, watching me walk and eat junk food. Either it was hungry, or (more likely) it had been sent to check up on me by my calorie-counting app. Or my kids.

But there’s one good thing about technology: If it’s time to summon people for dinner, I just turn off the Wi-Fi and watch the whole family come running. And here’s a tip to help adults use computers. Change your password to “invalid”. Every time you get it wrong, the computer will says: “Your password is invalid.”

You’re welcome. (IANS)

STAY CONNECTED

19,509FansLike
362FollowersFollow
1,773FollowersFollow

Most Popular

Leveraging New Technologies Can Help Protect Families During Covid-19

Families across the world have been under tremendous pressure in the face of the ongoing crisis. Deep-seated gender inequalities and discrimination have ensured that...

Popularization Of Clear Teeth Aligners In India

Traditionally, the orthodontic procedure that seeks to "correct" crooked, overlapping, crowded, and gapped teeth has relied on metal braces. The image of a wired-teethed...

How To Achieve The Feathered Eyebrow Look In 5 Simple steps

The 2021 photo-ready brow look of the year is 'Feathered eyebrows'. Light and fluffy brows that enhance the natural face structure and at the...

Knowing About Mental Health Awareness Week

Mental Health Awareness Week runs from May 10-16 this year. During this pandemic, millions of us have experienced a mental health problem or seen...

Here’s How You Restore Collagen In Your Skin

Collagen is responsible for the irresistible quality, texture, and bounce found in baby skin. Collagen makes up 80 percent of skin and consequently is...

Here’s How You Can Manage Post Vaccine Symptoms From Home

A sore injection site, pain in the injected arm, mild fever, moderate fatigue, headaches, chills, and even diarrhea are symptoms commonly seen after administration...

BJP: Making Fun Of India’s Culture Is Shashi Tharoor’s Favourite Pastime

The BJP slammed former Union Minister and Congress MP Shashi Tharoor for questioning the progress the country made in recent years. The saffron party...

Why In India, Healthcare Delivery Is A Challenge

Recently, it was flashed in the media that people are struggling outside the hospitals to get a bed. Several celebrities have also conveyed that...

Recent Comments