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Relationship Advice : If a Guy Makes You Choose, Choose Yourself over Him

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If he makes you choose, then he's not the one for you. Pixabay

Love is said to be the purest form of emotions where nothing is above the happiness of your lover. But if a guy makes you choose, is he really the one for you? A relationship is true only without conditions.  There are some things you just can’t let slide:

  1. Your Friends vs Him

    It is important to know your friends are just as important as his. Pixabay

Does he make you choose between hanging out with your friends and him? It’s important to know your friends are just as important as his but if he makes you choose, think about the health of the relationship again.

 

  1. Your choice of Clothes vs His Choice

    He should not make a fuss about what you wear. Pixabay

We all are entitled to wear what we want; skirts or sarees, shorts or suits, crop tops or sweatshirts it’s all our choice and not anyone else’s. If he makes a fuss about what you wear, is changing clothes for your relationship really worth it?

  1. Consensual Sex vs His will

It’s worth it only if it’s consensual

If you are not ready for the next step, you are simply not ready and anything he says or does should not make you think otherwise. In a relationship there is a bond of love not the idea of sex, he will respect your decision and wait for when you want to.

  1. Free will vs Settling down

    Forcing someone to get married is definitely not a green signal from a guy. Pixabay

In the day and age of 2017, there are certain goals everyone wants to achieve before getting married which could be career-wise, personality wise or even life skills. Forcing someone to get married is definitely not a green signal from a guy. If you don’t want to get settled just yet, he should respect that or else is he worth the wait?

  1. Career Support vs Career Shaming

Growing up, we all aspire to become something successful in our respective fields and when someone looks down on you for something you’re passionate about, is that really love? If your guy can’t support your career decisions and paths how do you think he will satisfy being “the one”?

  1. You vs Him

If he makes you choose between his personal desires and yours, it’s a red signal to back up. An individual should respect one’s personal choices as much the other respects theirs.

If you have nodded your head in disappointment to any of the following pointers in your relationship then you should put on your thinking cap and dwell on your current situation. If he is making you choose then definitely he is not the one.

 

Prepared by Tanya Kathuria of Newsgram; Twitter: @TanyaKathuria97

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Girls, are you Looking for a Guy your Parents Would Approve? Here Are 10 Reasons why you Should give the ‘Nice’ Guys a Chance!

Wasting time on the wrong guys can be exhausting. They make you question yourself, leave you hanging and you often feel an urge to give up on the entire idea of dating

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Our society has created a negative image of the 'nice guy.' We give you reasons why you should date one, instead! Pixabay

New Delhi, September 22, 2017 :  “He was …. nice.” That is what our girl friends usually tell us about a guy they go out on a date with, don’t they?

Over a conversation that lasts 30 minutes, they go on and on about how he was at the restaurant before she reached, pulled out the chair for her. Allowed her to order food, opened doors for her, and even showed interest when she mentioned her dog (We don’t know about you, but a guy who loves dogs? Yes please!) All this, but he was just ‘nice’.

Does she plan to see him soon? She “doesn’t know”.

Our society has created a negative image of the ‘nice guys.’ It is a way to describe someone who is timid, subtle in his efforts, and inexperienced. Or, from what we have understood from conversations, “not that interesting.” He’s just “nice.”

In an attempt to find our perfect match, we often immediately ignore such ‘nice’ guys we encounter on the way. It’s not very difficult, especially when the players are irresistible, look dreamy and have just the right words to say. But little do we know, by immediately ignoring the Beeba Munda (nice guy), we could be overlooking the ‘good’ guy we are on the look out for.

Take it from a single girl (yes, we know better about relationships than those in it), the next time you’re on a date and begin to realize how ‘nice’ this guy is, you must start to recognize the following positive qualities instead of immediately eliminating all future chances,

  1. They Invest Their Mind In You

They will keep a note of your schedule, ask about that meeting you were worried about and make sure they listen to you rant about how you dislike your job and how your mother never understands you.  Be sure to always be in their thought and rightfully so.

nice guys
The nice guys will not make you second guess- the first sign of a healthy relationship. Pixabay
  1. They Notice The Little Things

Not just to what we say (that’s a basic, though), but to how we do the things we do and all our little quirks. They notice how you like having pizza crusts, follows up on that presentation you were nervous about and makes sure to check during the day if you’re doing good. These gestures show how genuinely interested he is, that he cares to know her better. (Ah, this is what dreams are made of)

  1. They Motivate You To Be A Better Person

    They will remind you to call your parents, never stop you from gorging on junk food but will make sure you eat your greens too. Nice guys make sure they include you in their plans which are, nice too.

  1. They Will Be Totally Trustworthy

Well, they are called nice guys for a reason, right? The absence of trust in a relationship never allows for a rock solid foundation. How will a relationship survive then?

Nice guys won’t lie, cheat, manipulate or play games with you. They will not just be your partner; they will be your best friend.

  1. They Give You Something Real

Wasting time on the wrong guys can be exhausting. They make you question yourself, leave you hanging and you often feel an urge to give up on the entire idea of dating.

nice guys
Fairy tales may or may not exist. The nice guy will give you a real story, instead! Pixabay

Nice guys, on the other hand, will be everything you would want in your partner. They will be honest, and will not shy away from accepting they are wrong. You will see sincere affection in their actions and they will stand by you for all the right reasons.

  1. They are Perfectly Imperfect

He may not have 6-pack abs, but he’ll have shoulders strong enough for a warm embrace. He may not be the tallest, but he’ll be tall enough to help you pick out jars from shelves you cannot reach. He may not be impeccably dressed, but he will invest time and effort to put his best forward. Someone who is not just aware of, but is okay with his imperfections and doesn’t try to hide them.

Nice guys are just that – they understand their shortcomings and know just how to work with them in their stride.

ALSO READ Study: Supportive Relationships Can Help You Face up Challenges

  1. They Restore Your Faith

Dating the players can be exhausting and disheartening. But just when you thought you should give up on the idea of dating, you meet a nice guy. And he turns out to be everything you had ever wished for.

Even at your worst, he will love and support you just the same as when you are at your best. Yes, not all guys suck and opening yourself to the right guy will restore your faith and prove that real relationships do exist, after all.

nice guys
A good relationship is not when your man saves you from all troubles. Instead, it is when he supports you enough to save yourself. Pixabay
  1. They Have Been Friend-Zoned Before

Nice guys have their fair share of time spent in friends-only territory, and they know a thing or two about listening to women, giving them advice and helping them through tough times. All these qualities are the kind of thing we look for in our potential partners.

ALSO READ Cheaters Beware : This is How the Dating App SwipeBuster is Going to Catch You in Your Game

  1. They Make Us Want The Happy Ending

All of us dream of a ‘happily ever after’ but if we keep choosing the wrong guy and getting our heart broken repeatedly, it can be difficult to keep that dream alive. Sure, we have all had bad dates, failed relationships and almost-relationships but when you find the right guy, he proves why it has all been worth the wait

  1. They Change Our Type

Whether we admit it or not, nice guys are usually not on the top of our desired list. After all, there is something irresistible about a smooth talker, and we often have trouble breaking away from guys who spell total trouble. But once you are open to something new, you realize it was not that bad to give the nice guy a shot..