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Big Fat Indian Wedding: How to make it more Special with Proper Planning!

The average cost of a wedding at $31,213 in 2014, says TheKnot.com

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making your special Day a memory forever
Special Day with an appealing presentation

Nov 17, 2016: Weddings are the most celebrated moment in a person’s life. It not only ties two individuals in a beautiful relationship but also brings their families and their cultures together. Therefore, wedding plans for a girl become very important at an early age even when she is unaware of its importance.

The day becomes ‘THE DAY’ for her when it comes to her wedding. A more sophisticated version of wedding are brought forward with the efforts of recently emerged wedding planners. They are kind of event managers and at times the sole planner of the entire fairy tale process. They not only bind the events but also shape the emotions of the families with a gentle touch of perfection. But the question arises are they really worth it?. Let us discuss this in brief.

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Planning a wedding is not a simple task. It involves detail planning and  proper execution depending on the type and time of the event. Jayana Cooke, CEO of “EventTup”, an online market place for finding event venues says very precisely that “be sure that your planner is as detail-oriented as you are and has values and communication styles that align with your own”. This is the very first step to gain the trust of your client. Unlike other businesses it is not only a

Unlike other businesses it is not only a profit-making source but it is also a trust-oriented emotional approach between the client and the planner. Weekes: “Contrary to what I was told when I first got into the business, Type-A clients work well with planners; in fact, I think they make us better planners. However, you need to be honest with yourself about whether it’s something you can do comfortably.” Well, nonetheless honesty is an important factor of any business. The frankness between the client and the planner helps in building a better co-ordination.

PLANNING IS ALL YOU NEED
Estimated Cost of Wedding expenses in a metro City

Planners do have an inside track, which means they can sometimes save your money — but not always, says Cooke. If your budget is already stretched, but you could really use help, consider a day-of coordinator. According to Graham, “planners often offer multiple tiers of service. Be sure to ask for a customised service if you don’t see what you need on the planner’s initial price list”.

Consulting fees are the first step to start with your wedding. The initial plans are sketched out in the beginning and the rough estimate is given to the client. These meetings are a great opportunity for the wedding planner to upsell the client and recommend a Day of Coordination or even a Full-Service wedding package. Luckily for you, many times the client will realise they really do need more help than they had originally thought. However, these recommendations should be reserved until after the session has completed, as the client is paying you for your expertise, not your sales pitch. According to The Association of Bridal Consultants, the average total cost for a wedding consultant is $3,636 in the northeast and $2,635 in the south. The national average is $3,262

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TheKnot.com estimates the average cost of a wedding at $31,213 in 2014. Using Nancy Flottmeyer’s 10% rule, you’re looking at a $3,000 line item that is completely missing from your budget. Not having a clear understanding of your expenses can lead to overspending, so it’s best to keep the budget comprehensive and focused. Some wedding consultants get paid by the businesses they promote, so you want to make sure to read the agreement closely before signing.

Asking the consultant directly how they structure their fees, including whether or not they accept compensation from vendors, is a fair question, says Flottmeyer. “Ideally, the answer should be, ‘We recommend the best business for you,’” she says. They should be focused on connecting you with vendors that he or she believes are the best fit for your aesthetic and budget, not on collecting extra fees. Bonus tip for getting more for your money: “I always tell brides to treat everyone with respect,” Flottmeyer says. “When you do, the flowers get bigger, the band plays longer, and sometimes vendors might not charge you for little extras. It’s common sense—treat everyone kindly, and consider tipping or extra gifts as a thank you.”

Wedding planners try and plan the best wedding moment for you. They look into every detail starting from the venue to the thank you gifts. It entirely depends on the client as to what they want and how they want. If they want a simple wedding to tie their knot they can surely go for it. If they plan for a wao wedding to woo their guests this will incur to an extravagant wedding.

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A high-end wedding planner often charges twice the same price as an average wedding planner, who in turn use your budget judiciously for each event. With the high-end capitalism, all functions have become more a lavish oriented product than a simple custom event.

To reduce the effect of the extravaganza one should have an authentic taste. Marriage is more of a personal event than a professional event, it should be dealt in a very delicate manner or else it gets highly over magnified capitalistic affair and looses its flavor.

–  by Saptaparni Goon of NewsGram. Twitter: @saptaparni_goon

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Bride Sale in India: Buy A Wife Policy

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Human Trafficking
Bride Slavery in India: Abhishek Suresh

Bride Sale: Story of transformation of Indian Bride into Slave Bride

Samridhi Nain

Bride Sale in India seems to be trending in Haryana, a state with the lowest sex ratio, even marriage continues to be a way of exploitation as Indian brides for marriage are purchased at cattle rate and trafficked into the states of Haryana, Uttar Pradesh, and Punjab.
These ‘brides’ are imported from poverty-stricken states like Jharkhand, Bihar, Orrisa, West Bengal & Assam, where the traffickers either take advantage of the family’s poverty or abduct the young girls varying anywhere between the ages of 15 and 30, according to 2013 National Crime Records Bureau (NCRB).
The bride sale practice has been completely normal in the northern states due to the acute shortage of girls because of practices like sex selection and female foeticide. But if the reports are to be believed then even if not a single case of female foeticide takes place in Haryana, it would still take 50 years to get the numbers back to normal from India’s sex ratio today. However, the problem remains as locals & Khap leaders keep refusing to accept the facts at hand. Some believe it is the education of women that is the root problem because they want to marry a man who is also well-educated, whereas some believe that there has always been a shortage of girls but before where one woman would take care of five brothers, now, it requires five separate women to do the same.
As Haryana keeps preferring the male child and that male child grows up to prefer a bride, the best solution available at hand remains of these women who are bought at a price varying on their age, beauty & virginity and once bought, they are turned into a slave bride. Once married, these women can be resold as they are not viewed as a respected member but a commodity as they are not considered to be entitled to any inheritance by the family.
Human Trafficking to Bride Sale
Stencil of Missing Girls Project, Wikimedia Commons
A field study, covering 92 villages of Mahendragarh, Sirsa, Karnal, Sonipat & Mewat districts had been conducted on the impact of the sex ratio on marriage which covered over 10,000 households and found that 9,000 married women were bought from other states. The study was conducted by NGO Drishti Stree Adhyayan Prabodhan Kendra but the families kept denying of any exchange of money for the bride.
In 2016, the ministry of women and child development came up with India’s first comprehensive anti-trafficking laws under ‘Trafficking of Persons (Prevention, Protection & Rehabilitation) Bill, 2016 but the bill faces many challenges and is believed to not achieve its objectives of preventing trafficking & providing protection & rehabilitation to trafficked victims. Activists also believe that the bill will be able to do very little to stop the bride sale.
With such haunting demographics at hand, the hope still remains that sooner or later, the government might realize the need for stringent implementation of the rules & regulations to stop the violation of these young women at the hands of sex traffickers and quell this ‘Buy A Bride’ policy.
-Samridhi is a student of Philosophy Hons. at the University of Delhi.

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24 years after Converting his Faith to Islam, 52-year-old Sheshadri from Mysore Returns to Hinduism

What was the reason for his conversion from Islam to back to his original religion Hinduism?

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Sheshadri originally belonged to a Brahmin family
(Representative image) Sheshadri originally belonged to a Brahmin family. Wikimedia
  • Sheshadri lost his mother when he was only 2 years old and he also lost his father while he was studying in class 10
  • No one from his community came to help him and to survive he had to take odd jobs at hotels in Mysore and Bengaluru 
  • He adopted Islam religion as he developed a liking for that religion

 Mysore, Karnataka, August 25, 2017:  Sheshadri, an old man from Mysore who is  59 yrs old and earlier belonged to a Brahmin family and Shree Vaishnava Pantha Brahmin community. He later adopted Islam religion. Now, after a long duration of time, Sheshadri and his 20-year-old son Syed Ateek have converted back to Hinduism.

Here’s how a Brahmin man who first converted to Islam and later came back to his own religion- Hinduism:

  • Sheshadri is a resident of Jakkanahalli (a small village which falls in Mandya district) town Shree Ranga Pattana in Karnataka. His profession is that of a lorry driver in Mandya.
  • His father’s name was late B Govindaraju, who was a priest and follower of Ramanujacharya, a Hindu theologian and held a belief in Vishishtadvaita (non-dualistic school of Vedanta philosophy).
  • His mother’s name was Kamalamma, who was a Shaiva Brahmin and follower of Adi Shankara’s Advaita Vedanta (a type of Hindu philosophy and religious practice, they believe that their soul is not really different from God). 
  • But his parents didn’t have an easy life as they had to leave the town as the community opposed their marriage.

ALSO READ: Tamil Brahmin’s transformation to urban middle class 

  • Sheshadri didn’t have a normal childhood. He lost his mother when he was only 2 years old and he also lost his father while he was studying in class 10.
  • During those tough days no one from his community came to help him, to survive he had to take odd jobs at hotels in Mysore and Bengaluru.
  • In 1993, he started working as a lorry driver with Syed Keezer from Kollegala. At that time, Sheshadri adopted Islam religion as he developed a liking for that religion.
  • Sheshadri married Fahmida, who was a relative of Syed Keezer and with her, he had two sons- Syed Ateek and Syed Siddiq.
  • But even his marriage didn’t last long as Fahmida left Sheshadri 2 years ago because of some conflict and after it, she started living with her parents and took her younger son Syed Siddiq along with her.
  • This event affected him in a huge way, leaving him frustrated and thus he decided to convert back to the religion he originally belonged to that is Hinduism.
  • His elder son Syed Ateeq joined him in conversion and changed his name to Harshal.
  • Sheshadri talked about the reason for conversion from Islam to Hinduism. According to Banglore Mirror report, he said “I embraced Islam and married a Muslim woman due to restrictions from our community. I was always eager to come back to Hinduism. I will now persuade my wife and the other son to convert to Hinduism.”
  • There was a Ghar Waapsi (homecoming) programme held for Sheshadri, conducted by Pramod Mutalik, Sri Ram Sene chief at the Arya Samaj Mandir, Mysore.

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Supreme Court of India to Announce Triple Talaq Case Verdict Today

The verdict will determine if Islam can enforce triple talaq as fundamental to the practice of religion

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Triple Talaq
Supreme Court is set to announce the verdict on triple talaq. Wikimedia
  • The Supreme Court will announce its verdict on triple talaq in India on Tuesday
  • Chief Justice JS Khehar heads the constitution bench of the jury
  • It will determine if triple talaq is fundamental to Muslim religion or not

New Delhi, August 22, 2017: The Supreme Court of India is set to announce its verdict on the triple talaq case that has gripped the nation since past few months.

The verdict is said to be a historic decision and will decide if the practice of triple talaq is fundamental to the Islamic religion.

Chief Justice JS Khehar heads the bench that comprises of five judges. After six days of the hearing, the bench had held its verdict on May 18. The verdict will determine if Islam can enforce triple talaq as fundamental to the practice of religion.

Other esteemed names in the jury include R F Nariman, Kurian Joseph, S Abdul Nazeer and U U Lalit. All the five justices come from different religious backgrounds.

ALSO READ: Muslim Law of Divorce ‘Triple Talaq’ is Sinful and Undesirable but can be permissible if not misused, AIMPLB tells Supreme Court

Among the petitioners are Muslim women who label triple talaq as simply unconstitutional.

The Supreme Court had already acknowledged during the hearing that triple talaq as a way of ending the marriage was “not a desirable” form.

Many legal experts have raised their voice against the Islamic practice, including the likes of Ram Jethmalani.

Other experts on the other hand, like Kapil Sibal, claim that the basis on which the practice is founded is the faith which cannot be simply changed.

– by Saksham Narula of NewsGram. Twitter @Saksham2394


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