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Remember that emotions are neither masculine, nor feminine, nor right, nor wrong, they simply exist.

By Devina Kaur

Is there a certain time period to wait to heal from losing a loved one? This is a difficult question to answer, but very important to ask. I personally get asked this question a lot, and my response is always the same: "It takes as long as it takes." Some people want to know exactly how long their recovery period will be so they can know when they've "gotten over" their loss.What is not okay to feel is any form of regret. Regret for all the things that you could not give to that person. Regret that you didn't even get to say goodbye. Regret that life did not turn out the way it was supposed to. All of these regrets can put you in a slumber that you will not be able to escape, so do not regret a thing! Every day we hear about a new death in the news, someone who was just starting out in their life, or someone who was on the brink of dying from a terminal illness. These stories strike our hearts and make us feel something inside. We remember how it felt to lose a loved one and we wonder if the family affected feels the same way that we did. If you're reading this, then you might be having some difficulty coping with the loss of your loved one and are desperately seeking the journey to healing.

Here are 3 tips that can help you through it:

Surrender to the experience and unveil
Surrender to the experience of your loss. Don't try to change it. Surrender to it being messy, lost, or incomplete. Surrender to the fact that life does go on, though not in the same way. Surrender to not being okay. In truth, no one can ever really "handle" a loss and often it affects you deeply, but what I wish more people knew was that our grief is more than okay, it's important. We all carry a story within us and sometimes those stories are heavy and painful. Your grief is a story that tells you more about the experiences of your life. Don't be embarrassed of it, don't run from it and don't let anyone tell you that you're weak for feeling it. It's okay to feel your feelings.

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Sindoor implies the longevity of a woman's marriage to her husband in the Hindu tradition

Married Hindu women are recognised by a red streak of vermillion in the middle of their foreheads. This is traditionally called 'sindoor', which is derived from the Sanskrit word sindura, meaning 'red lead.'. Sindoor is traditionally powdered turmeric and lime, sometimes red saffron, or red sandalwood. It is also called vermilion, or Kumkum.

Vermilion powder mixed on a plate Sindoor is traditionally powdered turmeric and lime, sometimes red saffron, or red sandalwood. It is also called vermilion, or Kumkum. Image source: Photo by Gayathri Malhotra on Unsplash

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Toe rings or bicchiya worn by married Hindu woman

Toe rings, or commonly known as 'bicchiya' in Hindi, are worn by married Hindu women in India. They are worn in the second toe of both feet and are usually made of silver metal.

It is believed that toe rings are worn by married Hindu women as a symbol of them being married, and are not removed throughout their lifetime.

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Holy water is poured onto the palm of the groom's hands, allowing it to flow through his fingers onto the bride's hand and later into the groom's hand.

Kanyadaan which translates to a donation of a daughter (Kanya meaning daughter and daan meaning donation) is a ceremony performed at Hindu weddings by a senior male figure from the bride's side symbolizing him giving away their daughter to the groom's family. Unlike today's perception of kanyadaan as trading a daughter from one family to another, originally kanyadaan was a moral concept revolving around acceptance, a ceremony performed to represent that the parent is asking the groom to promise to accept, respect and treat their daughter as their equal in all manners while the audience bears witness to the promise.

Story and Origin of Kanydaan

In a Hindu wedding, the groom is considered to be an incarnation of Lord Narayana whereas the bride is considered to be the incarnation of Goddess Lakshmi, the goddess of wealth and prosperity and the parents are assisting in the union of the two 'Gods'. This belief is the reason behind another ritual of welcoming the bride to her in-laws with the plate of Alta (a liquid mixture of water and vermillion powder) where she is asked to step on the plate and then enter the house. The red footprint of the bride signifies the arrival of Goddess Lakshmi.

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