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The emotional rollercoaster is one that we ride for life. And sometimes it's a lot less fun than the physical amusement park kind. But over time, we learn to navigate the ups and downs, the twists and turns, and even the loops. Our kids, however, are still new to this ride. So, as the all-knowing, holding-the-secrets-to-life parents, it's our job to hold their hand and help them navigate it.
Here are some handy tips and tricks by Manoj Jain, Director, Scram Kidswear, that cover some of the more common emotions one might come across on this rollercoaster. On today's ride, let's talk about anger.
Anger is instinctual and probably the easiest to surface, especially when you're a tiny human. It's a feeling that our kids will face often, just like we do. It's mostly viewed as a negative emotion and our instinct is to tell our kids that it's bad. But it's as natural as the rest of them. Instead of repressing it, we'd rather teach them how to express it effectively and communicate their feelings, whatever they may be.
Step one: Identify the emotion
For children, recognising emotions isn't as straightforward as it is for us. That's why the first step is to identify the feeling. When you think they're mad, try mimicking their facial expressions and asking them if that's what they're feeling. If it's not, let them tell you how they're feeling about a situation because sometimes they might not be mad at all. In this way, you'll understand their emotions better without invalidating them. And it'll give your little one a chance to correct you if you're wrong (which is going to happen from time to time so don't worry about it).
Step two: Explain the feeling
After both of you are on the same page, explain the feeling to them and the correct ways in which to express it. Try asking them to put their feelings into words instead of actions. Like for example, "I didn't like it when my friend took my toy from me" instead of going full Chucky on their butts (which is pretty fun to watch, if we're being completely honest). But regardless of the reason, gently remind them it's fine to feel this way and their feelings are important to you.
A handy tip to make this easier is to ask them to spot these emotions in the books they read or the things that they watch. Not only will it be a lot more fun, but it'll also help them set a reference point for themselves that they can relate to.
Okay, we're going to level with you. It's easy to break these things down when you're thinking about them logically. But we also know that kids are anything but that. So don't expect an overnight change in the way they express themselves (and don't beat yourself up for it). These things take time and patience and a lot of repetition. There will definitely be a few bumps in the road along the way. But that's a part of the ride. Rollercoasters wouldn't be as fun without all the twists and turns, would they?
Article was originally written by N. Lothungbeni Humtsoe. (IANS/ PJ)
Keywords: Children, Parents, Parenting, Emotions, Understanding
Ashtottaram 52) OM PANCHAŚĒLABODHITABHŨMYAI NAMAH:
Ashtottaram 52: OṀ (AUM)-PAN-CHA-SEE-LA-BO'-DHI-TA-BHOO- MYAI—NA-MA-HA
ॐ पञ्चशीलबोधितभूम्यै नमः
(Pancha: Five; Śēla: Conduct; Bodhitam: That which conveys, reveals, teaches)
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Ancient seers and sages have established Yama and niyama for human progress and advancement. They are ten of each. But out of these twenty, only five are considered very practical and can be observed by anyone without feeling any restraint to live by. These five are called Pancha Śeēla meaning- 'five rules of conduct. They are 1) Satya (nonlife, truthfulness), 2) Ahimsa (non-violence), 3) Asṫeyam (non-stealing), 4) Daya (compassion, empathy), and 5) Kṣhama (endurance). These not only improve our individuality but also help to co-live in society. Children are taught about these by their parents, teachers, relatives, and even by elders in the neighborhood.
Didactic compositions are a special feature of Sanskrit literature. Two of the more well-known works of such a type are the Panchatantra of Vishṇu Śarma and the Hitopadeśa of Nārāyaṇa. The Panchatantra (100 B.C.E) is the most celebrated and interesting work in Sanskrit literature, classed under the didactic fable group. It comprises five books or sections, each dealing with one particular tantra or rule of political conduct. It was taught by a wise teacher to the idle and stupid sons of a king at his request. The princes very soon became well-educated and well-behaved, due to the marvelous effect of the tales they heard from their preceptor. The Panchatantra is one of the most translated works in world literature.
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The five rules of conduct are self-explanatory especially asṫeyam, which probably is the reason why we never occupied or robbed another land or culture in the history of mankind. We can proudly say to the world that we are the only Bhāratēyās who followed asṫeyam as preached by our ancient seers and sages. Our Vedas, Upanishads and so many other sacred scriptures taught us the five rules of conduct to follow throughout our lives.
The land which taught us the morals and rules of conduct is our motherland, the 'Panchaśēlabodhita Bhūmi'.
From the moment our children enter our lives, we realize that it’s our responsibility to skill them appropriately, in order to help the tiny tots master the art of life.
As parents, it’s of utmost importance for us to guide our little ones in the right direction. However, in this process of parenting, we tend to overlook the fact that these young members of the family, in return, are teaching a plethora of valuable lessons to us too.
I hope you would agree that children and adventure go hand in hand. It is remarkable to see the kind of energy and curiosity they bring into any everyday activity. Their inquisitive nature and ability to be full of happiness makes the mundane joyous and exploratory. This is an important life lesson for all of us grownups, to find wonder and charm in small things we do.
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We, as parents, are sometimes extra cautious or even anxious to try out new things. But imbibing our children’s fearless approach to novel things can be a good precedent for many of us in order to expand our horizon and leave our reservations aside.
Even while interacting with children, we realize how important it is to open up and express our thoughts. The myriad of emotions displayed by children right from being happy, sad, sensitive, helpful, loving; we have a lot to learn from them as parents. It teaches us the importance of venting out our own feelings as much as possible to stay a cheerful person.
Expressing one’s emotions manifests transparency in one’s nature and helps in forming stronger bonds. In fact, there are various products as well, which are associated with Early Childhood Development and Learning that can facilitate parents and children to strengthen their bond further.
Being a parent myself, I understand the importance of this connection and through my newly launched e-store, the Brainy Bear Store, I have endeavored to provide a range of innovative products and systemic learning aids that aim to make early childhood learning interactive and fun for both parents and children. These products have been pedagogically mapped to shape the child’s growth, health, and happiness, which will further aid the parent and child cohesively. All the parents out there can find a wide range of unique products that will assist their child to achieve the milestones in vital cognitive, fine motor, and sensory skills.
The products of the store aim to help children in various aspects of their life while providing valuable lessons to the parents simultaneously. As a Parenting Coach, my advice to all the parents out there would be to find time, play, interact and be open to learning with your children as they grow. For, when they learn, you explore! (IANS/KB)
Family pets help children better manage feelings of stress and loneliness, which have been greatly exacerbated by virtual schooling as a result of the pandemic, shows a new survey. According to UNICEF, at least 1 in 7 children — or 332 million globally — has lived under nationwide stay-at-home policies for at least nine months since the start of the Covid-19 pandemic, putting their mental health and well-being at risk.
The Mars Petcare survey of parents reveals that more than eight in 10 parents found that their family pet helped their child feel less lonely during the lockdown, with more than three-quarters feeling that day-to-day interactions with their cat or dog reduced their child’s stress and anxiety. Parents agreed their pet supported their child during the unprecedented break from in-person schooling by improving their mood, providing companionship, and giving much-needed emotional support.
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For many families navigating the stress and challenges of home-schooling, pets have offered children crucial support. The survey also found that pets positively impacted a child’s experience of virtual learning and academic performance across all ages — with nine in 10 parents seeing improvements in their child’s emotional, social, and core skill development including having more energy and improved concentration, providing a fun topic of conversation to engage with their classmates and teachers, and giving them a much-needed break away from the screen.
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“There are proven benefits to having pets in the classroom when it comes to improving children’s confidence, focus, and reducing their stress, but this survey shows that pets also played an important part in helping children emotionally as they come to terms with this unprecedented time away from their peers,” says Mary Margaret Callahan of the leading therapy animal organization Pet Partners.
This increased bond between children and their pets has many benefits for the pet too. Three-fourth believed their pet is also calmer now that they spend more time with their child. (IANS/SP)